ITS SMOKIN JOE

"Let me tell you a little story, about a man a long time ago." The storyteller says, smiling. "He was the quickest draw in the wild west-" 

THE WILD WEST?! Duskie's ears perk up. KNIGHT, ODIO, ISN'T THAT WHERE THE GUY WHO YOU NAMED ME AFTER WAS FROM!?

"-by the name of Smokin' Joe."

"It's Smokin' Joe! Hit the floor!"

The ruptour walked, dagger tail dragging across the floor. He had a tired look in his eyes as he glared at the outlaws running off.

Although his tail was sharp and pointed, he didn't use it for battle. Instead, he flipped a peace sign at his foes, casting magic to explode them with a simple "Get lost."-

He was a ruptour too!?

"Duskie, please don't make the logical leap of since we named you after a cowboy, that means-"

"Let me make sure I heard you right!?" Smokin' Duskie asked. "This drink costs that much!?"

The cashier nodded.

"Sure, let me get my wallet-" Duskie moved to grab his wallet, but then suddenly- "GET LOST!"- swung his paw into a peace sign, the thumb pointing towards himself.

"Actually, do we even have opposable thumbs?"

Hmmm... Duskie took a moment to look at his paws, all while the storyteller kept speaking.

As you know, we all have annoying moments in our lives. Smokin' Joe dealt with any and every annoying moment in the exact same matter.

"Get lost." Smokin' Joe said, flashing a peace sign and causing the annoyance to explode.

Regardless of this trait, Joe held up the law, doing more help than harm to any towns he visited.

Only total idiots would talk badly about Smokin' Duskie, because he had the power to blow any of them up using his magical powers!

Leeroy 'Magic Pants' Jenkins thought that he could best Duskie, but before he could blink- "GET LOST!"

The Mongoose Mountain Gang played dirty with a twenty man crew- but as a gift from the gods above, Joe grew eighteen front legs that day.

Duskie, meanwhile, just got them all at once with the power of all four of his paws.

"Duskie, no. I don't think you can do a peace sign with your back paws-"

WATCH ME! Duskie thinks, distracted.

As he rose in fame, every challenger came to meet him- but all were bested by a single blow from Joe's magic!

He threw a fancy party, for reasons unknown, and when someone brought typical water as opposed to all of the magnificent dishes that others had cooked up for him, he blasted them with a "Get lost!" as quickly as if the offender had insulted his mother.

Smokin' Duskie got his name from how grand he was, taking the name from the great hero the Sundown Kid-

"No, actually, I don't think anyone knows that Sundown saved the world."

WHAT!? Really!?

Some thought that Joe had no clue that his foes had weapons alongside magic, and for that he'd say... The storyteller takes a deep breath, and Duskie's eyes widened as he realized.

The storyteller's gonna sing! Quiet down, you two!

"I know that they're packin' heat, and I know that they know that I'm the man to beat, but when I step onto the street with a dance to my feet, they know that I know that they can-" And with this, the storyteller takes another deep breath, and yells out the next line as loud as they can. "GET LOST!"

They say that many, many years ago, before Joe became Smokin' Joe, he had a wife by the name of Bo.

Wait, who's my version of the wife? Did Sundown have a wife?... Wait, didn't we have a wife?

"Well, uh..."

Bo was with child, in a happy home, her blue suit-

"Wait, is Smokin' Duskie's probably-dead wife a human like we were or a ruptour like we are?"

...

"Also, why does she look like we smashed Mad Dog and Alicia together?"

But into town, an outlaw came- wearing a cloak as red as blood.

Bo told Joe to run, and he did, hoping that she would follow behind him, or that he could find help- however, he saw no help ahead of him, and when he turned back, he saw no wife nearby him.

"Joseph Rudeboy, you're too slow!" For a child that he never knew- and now what else was left for him?

Burning inside, Joe was reborn like a phoenix, and became Smokin' Joe.

"Did he crumble into powder first?"

What?

"... You wouldn't get it."

"Knight-"

"HE WOULDN'T GET IT."

Joe rode a flaming pair of birds, looking for the same cloaked outlaw in the desert. At last, one of the birds dove down towards a ruptour wearing that exact same red cloak he had seen on that day.

"Finally." Joe snarled. "I had looked for you all over. Now..." He rose his paw. "G-"

But before he could blast the spell, the stranger shot him first with a spell that cut deeper than his ever did. "Get lost."

Joe collapsed, tumbling to the ground at once. He took a moment to look at the stranger, and recognized Bo's familiar face. "Bo?"

"Wrong." She said. "Her daughter."

The circle gasps, reeling back in shock. "So the kid lived!?" Someone yells out, and Duskie flinches from the sound.

Whoa... this couldn't happen to me, could it?

"Nope! No surprise daughters for us!"

The storyteller stands back, smiling. "Next story?" They ask.

Another ruptour snorts. "You forgot the best part!"

"Lemme make sure I heard you right." Joe said, looking at his daughter. "You've been tellin' everyone I was a deadbeat dad and didn't know I thought you were dead?!"

The daughter nodded.

"GET LOST!"

The crowd erupts in laughter, and Duskie opens his mouth and slips in another story with a smile on his face.

"Lemme make sure I heard you right." The daughter said. "Now that I've found my father and learned the truth, we can live happily ever after?"

"That's right!" Joe gave a thumbs up, or at least the closest thing a ruptour has to one.

Duskie took a deep breath before he said the last part of the story. "GET LOST, OLD MAN!"